From the moment your children are born a new game begins to emerge as each child starts to take on the personality of either yourself or your significant other. Sometimes it’s cute, “He looks just like his daddy!”. Other times it’s a commentary on some of your not so favorite traits, “That’s your attitude I’m getting from him. Just look at the way he’s looking at me.” Still other times it’s said out of complete exasperation, “I don’t know what to do. He’s literally driving me nuts and it’s like talking to a pre-teen you!”. I typically take all of the above as a compliment....until the things that make me who I am start to emerge in the the not so best of ways.
There are certain characteristics that I’m happy to pass on. My good looks, sense of humor even in the most depressing of situations, ability to keep pushing ahead no matter the challenge, a love of a good Spider-Man comic...then there are the things that keep you awake at night as you search your soul for ways to stop what you see as almost inevitable. You can see the mistakes they are making and while not exactly the same set of circumstances, it’s as if history is repeating itself. Maybe this person isn’t the best choice of friend? Please buddy, just focus on one thing and quit halfway doing three different things. I know you think this test will be a breeze, but if you don’t study you’re gonna get hit with a curveball. Quite striking out and expecting to land on your feet, you gotta be prepared for the What If’s.
I understand they are ultimately their own person, but somethings are just genetics and isn’t it our job as parents to stop the cycle that has plagued you your entire life (even if you didn’t always know it at the time)? That last sentence is a doozy. How can you fight genetics? How can you change the things in them that have made you who you are? Heck my dad wasn’t even around the majority of my life and I still turned out as a carbon copy (with some added anger issues supplied by the angry man). It sounds silly but I often find myself praying that the her in him will emerge someday and present itself like long dormant superpower. “Wow Dad! Look at how good I can drive!” “Dad, I just balanced my budget for the entire year.” “Dad, I made macaroni and cheese without reading the directions on the side of the box!”
Lately I keep coming back to the same problem, what if I can’t stop him from turning into me?
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